As I am thrilled and daunted by the possibilities presenting themselves this year, I find that by accepting 2 things in life, I am able to ground myself firm in who I am and in what I would love to create. I see my own life as a journey and a discovery, and I know that there will be a whole lot of the unexpected, the challenging and even new direction. I feel free to dream, to follow my truth and unattached to how it unfolds! There are two ideas that really, when I accept them, allow me to do this.
IDEA 1 – There are no guarantees in life!
We make choices and then must surrender to the consequences of those choices, good or bad. These are the natural ups and downs of life. There are million different ways to live life, to parent and to educate. There is no ‘one right way’. We can only listen to our own inner voice and make choices based on what we would love.
Let’s be honest for a moment. Have you ever lost your temper with your children and said or done things you wish you hadn’t? Have you ever closed yourself in your walk-in-robe or pantry and screamed? Have you ever gone in there, slid to your knees and cried? Have you ever been watching your children do something and cried those tears of absolute love, the truest purest kind? Have you ever been completely embarrassed by your child’s behavior or the words that make their way out of their mouths? Have you ever beamed with pride? Have you ever worried? Have you laughed? Have you giggled when you really shouldn’t have? My guess is that if you have not done all of these things then you probably can answer yes to most of them!
You see, we are never alone; there is someone out there who has been where you are. With this in mind I believe its time to stop beating ourselves up because ultimately when we do this we use up so much energy. This energy could be better used finding joy in life and creating a life that you would love for yourself, your children and your family.
Embrace the truth that ‘shit happens,’ and that there are no guarantees. Then choose how you respond to it all.
IDEA 2 – We cannot control who our children are and who they will become.
Letting go of our control over other people, yes including (and most importantly) our children, is one of the best and most liberating things you will ever do. It is a gift to them and a diamond to you. Stop trying to fix them, raise them and mold them. Instead see them for who they are in this moment and provide the conditions they need to grow. Let’s get out of the way and let them be.
Allow yourself to really SEE your children for who they are. They will guide you to be who they need you to be.
Make peace with these 2 things and you open up a tremendous amount of space for yourself, for the way you live your life and parent your children.